LEFT BEHIND

i feel so confused right now... one of my best friends dissappointed  me in a way that...i just feel so hurt inside, i feel like broken, i don't wanna explainn exactly what he did, because it's not easy to understand for everybody and sincerely i don't wanna talk about it, maybe the most important part of this is that, that "thing" he did makes me lose the hopes i have in humanity, it makes feel like there's nothing i can do, like i have to stand that this world sucks, and deal with it and that's not fair,so, i have to be a dumb hypocrite and pretend that nothing is happening?  I can't do that, i'm not like that and no one has answers to me, no one helps me, people(i mean my mother) tell me that is normal, people are like that and i should learn that this is the world we live in, but no i refuse! i can't pretend like nothing is happening i just can't.

My mom's answer wasn't very satisfactory and i try to look for help in my best friend, and i can't find him, and this whole thing leads me to feel so alone, like where are my friends when i need them, i feel like everybody's advicer but... who advices me? who cares about me? and i don't know if maybe is my fault maybe i actually don't ask for help, i don't know, but i feel so lonely, so left behind, like sometimes i think that i might die and they wouldn't even notice.

This is the first time that seriously i don't know what to do at all, i just don't know, am i supposed to quit to everything i believe in and act like i'm ok with the things that are happening? is that what i am supposed to do to make my existence less miserable?  i feel awful...